Caring for someone who is addicted is difficult, but this is also the time when your loved ones require the most help. As a result, extreme caution must be exercised when navigating these treacherous waters. You are not the addict, and you cannot be held accountable for the person’s recovery, but if you care about someone, you will want to help them in any way you can. Many people make mistakes here, believing they are assisting but actually hindering recovery. We will discuss how to support a family member or friend while remaining diligent and avoiding taking on the individual’s responsibility for his or her recovery in this article.
Long Term Support Without Taking Over Responsibility
In many situations, an addict’s behavior can be unpredictable. In the most severe cases of substance abuse, they may experience paranoia and delusion. Sadly, threats, deception, theft, and physical abuse are all common in the late stages of addiction. This is why it is critical that you only engage when you feel safe and the person can be present with you. It’s pointless to talk to someone who doesn’t listen. On the contrary, it will devalue anything you say to them and weaken your case further down the road.
If they truly need your assistance, assist them directly by talking to them, taking them to the doctor, or checking them into rehab. Never give money to an addict, even if they claim it’s for their recovery. Do not put yourself in a position of inferiority to them. If you beg an addict to stop, they will use their perceived weakness to manipulate you. Instead, tell them you love them, that you want to assist them in their recovery, and that you are always available to them.
Recovery is a lengthy process that should not be expected to be completed quickly. Relapses are common, but if they stick with it, they will eventually get a handle on things. Cognitive-behavioral therapy is still the first-line treatment, and while becoming certified in the approach would be beneficial, it is not an option for home treatment. Instead, make a commitment to see a skilled mental health expert while you can still do your research and assist in any way you can.
Once Clean, Steer Away
Once an addict, always an addict, as the saying goes. That is why an alcoholic in recovery should never drink alcohol again in his life. Of course, some people can handle it well, such as having a drink on vacation and calling it quits but this is uncommon, and you wouldn’t know unless you risked replasing.
It is not only dangerous to repeat bad behavior after addiction treatment, but it is also undesirable to have anything that could trigger the same set of actions. Even if you have never struggled with addiction yourself, it’s easy to understand the various ways it can change someones life. At any point in your day, you may be tempted by triggers that remind you of the behaviors that led you to addiction. For example, if they used to drink alone at a particular bar, it will be a long time before he or she can walk past that bar without wanting to go in.
It’s also critical for families to understand that a recovering addict is at a high risk of developing new addictions. A substance abuser or alcoholic is more likely to develop a gambling addiction. Food, sex, and shopping addictions are all closely related.
Recommended Reading
Any form of addiction requires professional help but addicts with a supportive family or circle of friends have higher chances of successful treatment. Addiction is a chronic disease, and because of this it’s critical for family members to stay alert and recognize the signs of compulsive behavior and addiction long after the family member has recovered. Behing part of a family support group is essential and reading, both facts and personal stories of others going through the same thing, can give a lot of comfort. While there’s no lack of English resources we would like to highlight two articles, one in French and one in Japanese. The articles can be translated directly in your browser, both on PC and smartphone, and it’s well worth it.
The first article is French and it’s one of the few written resources on gambling addiction in seniors. This is becoming more of an issue as more elderly people gain access to online bingo, casino, and betting sites, and it may be well hidden from family members. The second article is written in Japanese by JgaCare.com, a website dedicated to addiction. The article on what familes should and shouldn’t do highlights some of the most common situations family members are faced with when trying to help a family member with an addiction.